You Like Because, You Love Despite

This was something quite profound that a friend of mine mentioned during his wedding speech. He likened it to how loving someone isn't solely about the feelings which Hollywood seems to portray to the human race in this day and age, but it is a choice. He shared that this choice would entail sacrifice, and that it would mean accepting the person for who he or she is, regardless of his or her flaws. In other words, we do not get to pick and choose. 

All of us are called to love. In fact, this is the greatest commandment that Jesus Christ himself has given to his followers; that we love one another as he has loved us. 

The commandment for us to love one another is indeed a tall order. But of course, we know that it is possible. Many people have been able to live up to this commandment. For instance, despite the statistics that show how many couples are getting divorced in this day and age, we know of many couples who choose to remain faithful to one another, despite one another's flaws and shortcomings. We also see how teachers choose to love their difficult students, especially from the stories told by successful people about how their teachers always believed in them, even when they were most difficult to love. We also see this in many of our clergy, who despite suffering much under their people, still choose to love their difficult parishioners. 

And of course, we see this in the life of the apostles, who despite going through great persecution, and even martyrdom, chose to cling to their love for Christ and his Church. In fact, today the Church celebrates the Conversion of St. Paul, who also chose to be content in being a fool for Christ and suffering from injustice, danger, and even abuse. 

In a world where the choice to love others seems to be rather difficult, I often can't help but wonder why many people still choose to love. I for one struggle with loving those whom I find difficult to love. But the answer came to me in prayer the other day. The reason why many people are able to love is because they have received love. And it is because they've received love, that they are able to reciprocate. 

For instance, a married person who chooses to remain faithful to his or her spouse, despite the flaws which may infuriate the life out of him or her, is able to love because he or she receives love from the other, and therefore is able to reciprocate that love. More than a few teachers who are able to love their difficult students would tell you that it is because they had a teacher who believed in them during their youth, that they are now able to strive to make a difference in the lives of their students. And of course many members of the clergy who are able to love their difficult parishioners would tell you that they have been inspired by the life of older priests who chose to do the same. 

We definitely also see this in the life of the apostles, including St. Paul. All of them abandoned our Lord in his hour of suffering. St. Peter denied knowing who his Lord and Master was, when questioned by the authorities. St. Thomas doubted that his Lord and God had risen from the dead, and refused to believe unless he could see it for himself. St. Paul was responsible for the imprisonment for many Christians during his time as a devout Jew, and he even caused the death of the first martyr celebrated by the Church. But in spite of their imperfections, we see how God chose to love them. They experienced acceptance, forgiveness, and healing. And this was what gave them the capacity to love the Lord to the point of losing their lives. 

All of us are loved. Any well catechised Catholic would know that our God truly loves the human race, and that he is slow to anger and always ready to forgive. However, knowledge in the fact that one is loved is not sufficient. In order to love others, one must receive Love. At the end of the day, we cannot give what we have not received. 

The thing that we Catholics often take for granted (and I too am guilty of this), is that God's love is always available for us to receive, as long as we open our hearts to him. Right from the beginning of creation, we already see how much our God wants to be with us. He makes his love available to us in the people whom we encounter, in creation, in the struggles that allow us to grow, in his sacred scriptures (which many of us don't take the time to be with), and most of all, in his sacraments. 

The question is, how open are we to receiving his love? How deeply will we allow the Lord to love us?